Influencer part 2

Just got back from the second round of Influencer. This one was run by Al Switzler who co-authored the book. Today focused a little more on the big picture - how to stop talking and start teaching.

Al began by asking us how we usually try to influence others. We have a lot of bad strategies, but our go-to form of influence seems to be either talking (lecturing, nagging) or coercion. That is what we go to when we find resistance. That is the problem - it doesn't work as well as we would hope. The solution that Al posited is to replace the lectures, threats and nagging with experiences.

If we look at our strategies of persuasion on a scale, verbal persuasion would be on the least effective end. For example, you might tell your child "don't run into the street." On the other end of the scale you have direct experience. This is the most persuasive method - what better way to learn not to run into the street than by having a bad experience. This has obvious limitations. You don't want to learn of the negative effects of drugs by first becoming a heroin addict. So what do we do to find a way to help the child see the effects of running in the street without actually running in the street? The answer - or the in between method is the vicarious experience.

An example used in the presentation was two health care companies. Each made a presentation to try and motivate the entire staff to improve the quality of care. The first was a dry power point with lots of stats and the directer lecturing (boring). The next was a video of an actual patient who had experienced a heart attack. As you hear her narrate the story, her family and each of the people who cared for her (EMT, cardiologist, accountant, nurses, lab tech, etc.) started to file in and stand with her in the spotlight. It was a touching story and talked about all of the little things that each did to make her stay more comfortable. I know this is hard to describe without showing the video, but the second made a connection with your emotions. It was much more effective - and would be more effective for the staff than just seeing stats.

Another example is McDonald's. Their executives are required periodically to go and work the drive thru at a restaurant. They get real info about what actually happens. In one instance an exec noticed that the napkins were placed in an inconvenient spot and he was spending all day grabbing those. When he asked about that, the manager told him that they had send numerous emails to get it changed. A week later, the napkins problem was solved. It was that direct experience that really moved beyond the data. It added heart. This is what they mean by a vicarious experience. It taps into something, makes that connection and really influences you.

Now, you have to keep in mind that if verbal persuasion works, use it. When it doesn't work, then you need to change your strategy. Don't just get louder and repeat your lectures. There is a definition of insanity that it is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. They call this desperation. What it turns out to be . . . is nagging. We all know how effective that is.

So how do you get this vicarious experience. They suggested two ways: a field trip, and stories. The McDonald's story is a good example of the field trip. Harley Davidson's engineers are also sent to dealerships to talk to the mechanics so that they can get real experience with what they see on a regular basis.

To apply this, suppose you have a daughter that is having a hard time wanting to practice her piano. You come home and she is watching TV when she should be practicing. What do you do? Our default is usually to go to the verbal persuasion: nagging, threatening, counting, etc. How effective is this? So what would be some non-verbal persuasion tactics you could use? What about taking her to a concert where she could see somebody playing music she likes. Maybe you could arrange to talk to them after about how much they practice. You could play with the daughter. You could sit and listen. You could have her play on the phone for grandma. You could allow her more control over the songs she learns. Interesting. The defaut is going to verbal because it is easy and we are "good" at it. The trick is getting beyond that and creating vicarious experiences that will really motivate.

The other way is to tell stories. Stories have been used to teach forever. Just look at the bible. When you think of a training or a class you enjoyed, usually it is the stories that you remember. If you can figure out a way to either create your own stories or stories of others, that really helps. Research shows that hearing stories fires the same way in our brain as if we were experiencing the event ourselves. Hence the benefit of telling stories.

So that's the recap of day two. Move beyond just verbal persuasion to try and provide experiences which will really motivate people (and ourselves) to change. More to come . . .